Cast of Characters

(Last updated: October 5, 2002)

QUIRK: First Apperance: Quirk Vol. 1, #1. He's crusty! He's feisty! He's got a nose worse than Man-Thing's! He's Quirk!

 SLUDGE: First Apperance: Quirk Vol. 1, #1. Sole survivor of the disgustingly moist planet GRUNDGE, Sludge likes humid weather best because it keeps him nice and pliable. Easily the most amiable soul on board the Frigid, Sludge's favorite pasttimes are reading and drinking hot mud.

SMITH: First Apperance: Quirk Vol. 1, #1. He wants fun and he wants it now. He wants it in large quantities and without too much subtlety. Pilot school wasn't nearly enough fun, so he dropped out before learning the finer points of navigation and landing. His home planet, Bonzo, wasn't nearly fun enough, so he left.

CARPY: First Apperance: Quirk Vol. 1, #1. The unique winged computer who originally stole the Frigid to escape a life of chartered accountancy. Carpy's control over the Frigid and the extent to which he/she manipulates events on board is still in question.

THE FIGUREHEAD: First Apperance: Quirk serial #91. A bizarre concrete animatron in the shape of an Easter Island Moais who functions as CEO of Lockhead Dynamics. Who is behind The Figurehead this week? And where will it strike next?

MR. LOCK: First Apperance: Quirk serial #76. Super-powerful corporate android with a taste for forclosures. Destroyed in episode #105... but it's very likely that there are more where he came from.

The DALAI DADA: First appearance: Quirk serial #113. The Artmeister of the Spaceways, dedicated to spreading confusion and diffusion throught the universe in the name of Art.

THE OLD PROSPECTOR: First appearance: Quirk serial #9. Apparently a prisoner in Cowboy Land's minumum security jail, this grizzled old fellow is actually the town manager, working behind the scenes to keep the resort functioning properly. It's unlikely that we'll meet him again.

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NOCTURNE: First appearance: Quirk serial #131. Further developments as they occur...

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DR. SILENCE: First appearance: Quirk serial #101. Keep reading QUIRK every week to learn more...

KITTANA: First appearance: Quirk serial #131. Now appearing in QUAT SCRATCH FEVER.
WINSTON SCHMUTZ: First appearance: Quirk serial #1. Dimunitive master of the gaming planet RYSK, a mass-murderer who liked nothing better than to fry the losers of his games. Regrettably (?) killed in the destruction of his man-made planet.

MAX-OR: First Apperance: Quirk Vol. 1, #2. He's not evil, just misguided. And more powerful than a locomotive. Hailing from a long line of Clowns, Max fought for six days and six nights against a robotic opponent to save the lives of his family. He lost that fight, and now blames Quirk for the subsequent slaughter of his loved ones. Presumed dead in the explosion of Rysk (see below).

POLLY: First Apperance: Quirk Vol. 1, #2. Creator and leader of The Humor Agency, her face forever hidden under a happy theatrical mask, Polly is the deadliest and most elusive of the Sombra Cult's enemies -- and the sort of political leader whose motivations are not entirely to be trusted. Nonetheless, she has captured the hearts of both Max-Or and Quirk. Go figure.
THE DREAMER: First appearance: Quirk Vol. 1 #3. Bodiless alien lifeform which briefly possessed Quirk in an effort to become a Real Boy. Realized the error of its ways and flew off, never to be heard from again.
POX: First appearance: Quirk Vol. 1 #2. Sorceror accolyte to Sombra Cult leader BROTHER POWER (now deceased), it is not clear whether this strange little man with unknown and uncharted powers, or a force of nature. Still out there somewhere. (c.f. "The Day of The Dreamer," "The Humor Agency."

MALADY GRIEF: One of the Amazon Cowboys of Cowboy Land.

JUDGE ROYLENE BEAN: Real name unknown. Formerly mid-management for a media subsiary of Lockhead Dynamics, now retured. Was living as the self-styled monarch of Cowboy Land until Quirk ran her out of town (see "Planet of the Amazon Cowboys.")

Glossary of Places and Things

Lockhead Dynamics
The Evil Corporation (and, really, aren't they all?) that was the original owner of both Carpy and The Frigid.

The Frigid
Quirk's extra-dimensional ex-spaceship. Never needs fuel, which is really convenient. Covers vast distances in really improbably rapid time. Everyone ought to have one like it. UPDATE: Now reposessed by Lockhead Dynamics and presumed destroyed.

Shocksuit
Quirk's uniform, equipped with life support functions as well as miniaturized hydraulics to absorb damage and give the boy a fair amount of strength and vitality. Without it, Quirk would quickly perish.

Dadaverse
A pocket universe created by the Dalai Dada, which travels with him and, in part, supports his existence. Constantly growing with daily additions and inventions. The Dalai Dada hopes that it will one day become big enough to engulf the Multiverse, but he's got a lot of building to do before THAT can happen...

Dadabeamer
Device created by the Dalai Dada to beam disorienting art directly into the cerebral cortex of our brains. UPDATE: Tested once, in Quirk serial #133. It seems to have had little effect on Kittana, one of the unknowing subjects, but rumor has it that Nocturne, the only other test subject, was badly scrambled by the incident.

Earth
The entire planet sold out to Lockhead Dynamics in the mid-1990s (see QUIRK PDF Comic #10 for details) and turned into a theme park divided into Adventure lands frozen in time. Following the repossession of The Frigid, Quirk Carpy and Smith have been stranded here, and are presumably trying to find their way to an area that's sufficiently advanced to posess space travel...

Cowboy Land
The first of Earth's Adventure Lands that Quirk and his pals have visited...

Sombra Cult
First appearance: Quirk v1 #1. A faux religious cult that wants you -- and everyone else in the multiverse -- to get serious. Now. And you'd best keep your mouth shut about it and not complain, either.

The Humor Agency
A secret society of which Quirk was briefly a member -- against his better judgement -- which stands in direct opposition to the tenants of the Sombra Cult. Unfortunately they tend to do things like go into battle armed only with whoopie cushions and water pistols, and they would be offended if anyone suggested that they posed a SERIOUS threat to anyone...

Rysk
The notorious Gaming Planet (actually a man-made satellite built by the late Winston Schmutz) where winners go to win big and losers go to die...

The Big Game
Rysk's biggest draw. Two people who really hate each other get to duke it out in each other's minds. The premise is that one or the other player must find and answer the Black Telephone in each round, but that's really just an excuse to justify whatever mayhem the opponents can devise.

Framistat
A kind of spatial thermomiter that allows rooms inside the Frigid to be "unpacked" and expanded to any size desired by the crew.

Grundge
Sludge's "disgustingly moist" home planet. Destroyed when a distant sun went supernova and dried up every thing on the planet's surface.

Bonzo
Home planet of Smith. Named for the unusual shape of its land masses. Supports a wide range of anthropomorhic life.

Fwoink
a noise frequently made by Quirk's nose.

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